Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing, and perfect will. Romans 12:2 NIV
Becoming like Jesus, being His follower, is not a “one and done” experience – not simply a prayer we say or a decision we make. God’s goal for us is transformation, and that is an ongoing process, a cycle, of dying and rising again. Some things are put to death; other new things come to life. Doubt seems to be a signal that the process is beginning, and if we see it as a sacred experience, a tool God will use for transformation, we can see that God may feel far away in these moments, but He is actually very close.
Peter Enns, theologian, author, and professor has authored a book that has been profoundly helpful to me. Here is what he shares about sacred doubt in his book The Sin of Certainty.
“Doubt is sacred. Doubt is God’s instrument, will arrive in God’s time, and will come from unexpected places – places out of your control. And when it does, resist the fight-or-flight impulse. Pass through it – patiently, honestly, and courageously for however long it takes. True transformation takes time.
“Being conscious of this process does not relieve the pain of doubt, but it may help circumnavigate our corrupted instinct, which is to fear doubt as the enemy to be slain. Rather, supported by people we trust not to judge us, we work on welcoming the process as a gift – which is hard to do when our entire life narrative is falling down around us. But we are learning in that season, as Qohelet did, to trust God anyway and not to trust our ‘correct’ thinking about God. (Qohelet is the Hebrew word for Teacher/Preacher, the author of Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes is a book of questions and doubting, but the author chooses to trust God despite his doubts.)
“Doubt is divine tough love. God means to have all of us, not just the surface, going-to-church, volunteering part. Not just the part people see, but the parts so buried no one sees them. Not even us.”
God intends to use your doubts to transform you. Working with Him is sacred. He will be tender with your doubts.
- Write or say your own prayer to God, authentically sharing where you are.