Healthy Vulnerability

March 18, 2025

Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2 NLT

Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. James 5:16 NLT

All healthy relationships require honesty and humility. Healthy close relationships require honesty, humility, and vulnerability. Essential but not always easy.

A problem we have sometimes is that we mistake transparency/oversharing with vulnerability. We spread information and emotions onto people who are not prepared, equipped, or even desiring to handle them. Social media sees this from people on a daily basis and also sees the unfortunate result of worsening relationships instead of building them.

Healthy relationships are mutual – not one person consistently giving more than the other but sharing each other’s joys and burdens. This is significant to the “one command” of loving others Jesus gave us. We must intentionally seek and develop friendships where we feel safe to share our deep needs, hurts, and joys, and we are willing to extend our hands and hearts to them as well.

Many of us have had the hurtful experience of sharing with someone who proved themselves incapable or unwilling to be a safe and godly friend. They judged us for our struggle, or were envious of our joy and opportunities, or they betrayed us by sharing with other people the deep treasures of our vulnerability. We can learn two things from that experience: First, we can learn to be safe places for people to be vulnerable and open, and we can make sure we have a small group of very reliable friends who can be that for us. Secondly, we can learn that vulnerability can be messy sometimes. Therefore, we should approach it, give it, and receive it with grace and humility, without judgmentalism or feeling the need to be “the answer person.” We are at our best when we are co-journeyers on the path of following Jesus.

It can be uncomfortable and feel risky to find a circle of godly friends, inviting them into the sometimes messy and troubling depth of our emotions and thoughts, but it is deeply beneficial and rewarding. Reliance on God’s people is in a very real way reliance on the Lord Himself who created us for relationship. Let us find safe, healthy people; let us BE safe, healthy people. This is God’s desire for His family.

• Do you currently have a small group of people with whom to be vulnerable? If so, pray with thanksgiving for them. If not, ask God for helping in finding and being that person.