Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6 NKJV
Well then, if you teach others, why don’t you teach yourself? Romans 2:21 NLT
Proverbs 22:6 is one of the most famous verses in the Bible. It is spoken in faith and hope and sometimes in frustration. Sometimes we feel great frustration that we have taken our children to church and enrolled them in youth group, paid the expenses for them and their friends to participate in activities, and it just doesn’t seem to be “working.” What’s up with that?
Well, there are several things to consider. First, the results in this famous verse are not reported until the child is “old.” Don’t be discouraged because you haven't seen the results yet. Seeds we plant, feed, and water bloom over time. God will always be faithful.
But a significant truth to consider is this: Faith is not a checklist. You can commit to devotions and pray regularly with your children. You can attend church together. You can serve in the church and the community. You can give to the poor and help your children go on mission trips to serve. But it is vital to consider first who you are while you are doing these things. Are you simply checking off a list of “things to do”? Are these activities too often rote and routine, just something to get done because you should? Are you just teaching the kids, or are you growing too?
The most important thing is not checking off the list. The most vital thing is who you are becoming in the process. Who are the children seeing in you? Are they seeing someone who is living what they teach, humbling and passionately following themselves? The Romans writer asked a question I need to frequently ask myself, “Well, then, if you teach others, why don’t you teach yourself?”
None of us want to be a hypocrite. The simplest definition of a hypocrite is one who teaches or expects something from someone else they don’t do themselves. I need to keep my own faith life growing strong and vital in ways the next generation can observe, not just give them a to-do list. What they see in me in forgiveness, grace, mercy, and humility, the fruit of the Spirit will trump the best list anytime. My prayers and my mentoring life combined is what they need most.
- When I think about what I hope for and expect from the next generation, what areas need further growth in me to be the best, most authentic teacher for them? To effectively train up children in the way they should go means to walk that way myself.