This past week I had the opportunity to spend five days with twelve guys who were all leading at some level in the world. All of us are in different types of leadership, all at different places in our spiritual journeys, all with varying life experiences, and with different relational components.
We shared cabins for five days and ate together, getting to know each other through casual conversations. We had meetings where we more formally shared our stories (the parts we wanted others to know 😊). And then were given an agenda that we were required to follow.
The experience reminded me of the twelve disciples as Jesus called them together. They were twelve very different men. Different ages. Different family backgrounds. Different political views. Different kinds and levels of education. Different personalities and temperaments, Just different. Very different.
Yet they came together for a purpose they didn’t truly comprehend and had no idea what the outcome of their gathering would be. But it was an opportunity and they took it.
As the disciples were grown men and very opinionated, it was true in our group as well. All of us in the group of leaders have been leading for some time, we all have strong opinions, are right much of the time, and are used to things normally going in the direction we prefer. It was interesting to observe and think about how we expressed and interacted.
Of course, I can’t speak for the other participants, but for me it was a good and growing time. It was very good for me to hear other thoughts and perspectives, some that challenged my own. It was good for me to be certain to express my own opinions nondefensively. And it was good for me because being with others who are different from me (if I come with an open and humble heart) always challenges me and surfaces things that God wants to speak to in my life. I am a better man and leader today because I am working on things God pointed out to me that would improve the contributions He wants me to make through my place in life.
I also renewed my personal commitment to spend time and give an honest listen to people who are not like me.
So now, a question: When was the last time you intentionally and with good purpose spent time with someone who was very different from you? The last time you approached the opportunity as a learner, not to just “get it over with,” but to process and learn from respectful interaction? If we are like most others, we don’t often do that. It’s frustrating and too draining. Besides that, why invest my time in that way? I already know what I think. And I’m right. Right? 😊
Thoughts like that keep us stuck, not only in business, work, and personal relationships. There’s a possibility that is even why you are stuck in your relationship with Jesus. This is supposed to be a community journey where we love and listen and grow.
Part of the reason for Paul’s amazing contributions to the Kingdom of God is because he knew and practiced this. Listen to his advice to us. It’s a positive prescription: “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.” Philippians 2:3-5 NIV
Paul goes on to explain and elaborate – Jesus’ attitude was confident humility. That’s the attitude of a great and growing person and leader.